UNPLANNED PREGNANCY
Not everyones reaction to pregnancy is the same. Maybe youre too young, not married, dont have enough money, dont have the right job, or still live with your parents, and its just not the time to have a baby in your life. Unplanned pregnancy: the only positive news that can make your heart sink. With three million unplanned pregnancies in the United States each year, you are not alone. You may be feeling anxious, fearful, depressed, and unsure of what the future holds. Knowing that someone else is dealing with the same thing you are can be comforting. There are so many questions and things to consider that it may be helpful to talk to someone on a helpline or through counseling.
If you feel like youre not ready to be a parent, there are three options available to help you deal with an unplanned pregnancy, including adoption, abortion, and counseling. If its adoption that is best suited for you and your situation, there are a wide range of adoption plans to choose from, including open and closed adoptions and independent, private, and agency adoptions. Its important to read up on abortion procedures and their risks if youre thinking about terminating the pregnancy. Dont give into anyone elses pressure to make this decision even if other peoples opinions matter. If this is the first time youve considered abortion if youve been against it in the past, ask yourself why youve changed your mind and spend some serious time considering whether you can live with the decision for the rest of your life. If a friend has had an abortion, talk to them about their experience. The most important thing is that you obtain as much information as possible so you are able to make the most well informed choice.
If you choose to keep the baby, examine both your own and the fathers situation. Is he willing to be there physically, emotionally, and financially for the baby? Will he support your decision? How can your dreams and goals be reached to make a better life for you and your child? Do you have insurance to cover prenatal care or postpartum care? Are you able to live on your own with a newborn or would you need to find a roommate or move in with a family member? The most important question to ask yourself is if you are ready to be a parent. Determine whether youll be able to give this child the things he needs, how you can raise this baby and still meet your own needs like finishing school or furthering your career, if you can afford to support the child financially, where you want to raise your child, and what your expectations are as far as what you think youll receive from having a baby. Its probably not the best idea to bring a child into the world simply because you want someone to make you happy and love you, or to bring you and your partner together. A baby makes life more difficult and demands a strong partnership between two parents; rarely does it bring two people closer together if the relationship is already destructive.
Everyone should have a guide for making a decision, especially one that will be life altering like bringing a new baby into the world. Every decision you have ever made has been related to your thoughts, values, and ideals, and ultimately you are the only one who has to live with the final decision. Figuring out your beliefs and values, if you dont already know them, and finely examining the circumstances will hopefully help you to make the best choice for you. Because it is such a huge decision, its important to find a quiet place to record your thoughts and feelings about how you felt when you found out you were pregnant and make a chart to list the positives and negatives. Think about the life you would be able to make for the child and what kind of situation a baby would be born into if he were to come into your world today. Consider the goals you have for your own life, what kind of person you want to be, how you want others to view you, and what you need to do right now to make all of this happen. Talk to someone you trust and whose opinions you respect, and seek out someone who will be supportive of your decision, no matter which option you choose. You probably also want to look at how the most important people in your life would feel about your ultimate decision, because they are the ones who will still be in your life even after youve made the choice.
